What is it about Monday's? There have been many songs written about it, and most of them have not a good thing to say.
Rainy Day's and Monday's--The Carpenters
I don't like Monday's--The Boomtown Rats
Blue Monday---Fat's Domino
Call it Stormy Monday--Nancy Wilson These are just some songs and not one has a good thing to say about Monday. Now i know it is the first day of the week for many, and that in itself is a drag but at the same time i find it refreshing a day as there is. For Teenagers it is time to return to the books after a weekend with their friends, and for adults back to work after trying to accomplish work around their homes and visiting family and friends.
And Monday's have always had an interesting aura around them. They have been called Black Monday-Blue Monday-Wet Monday-Miracle Monday-Bloody Monday among others. And of course we have Easter Monday[or for some the First Monday]. Monday is the day to get the workweek on track and create a whole slew of new" to-do lists". There is even a medical ailment called "Mondayitis" an illness associated with Depression, involving going back to work.
The expression"Monday's child is fair of face" is actually inspiring,not a comedown. And since the first Monday there have been over 100,000 Mondays and yet the world still goes on. Some major events have happened on a Monday, yes, and here are some of them--Salvador Dali died on a Monday--Terry Kath of the Jazz/Rockband Chicago was shot to death on a Monday-Brenda Spenser inspired the Boomtown Rats to write "I don't like Mondays" by killing 2 people in her school on a Monday Morning-a protest in London England in 1886 on aMonday led to a riot and many unknown deaths--Wall street crashed on a Monday in 1929. Those are just some of the events that happened on a Monday. A survey in Colorado in 2002,found over a period of 6 weeks that more accidents happenned on the Roadways on a Monday than any other day. In Las Vegas a study done by the University of Las Vegas found that more police reports of Domestic Disturbances happened on Monday's.
Now are Monday's all bad? Of course not. In my case Monday's are usually the best day of the week. It is a day off for me and it allows me to hit the Malls and go shop, and the trafficc is always lighter going as fewer people are out and about during the day. So Monday's are my Sunday's and i appreciate them even if most people hate them. So Monday's are here to stay and nothing we do will change that, so i suggest that everyone learn to love Monday's, Hell there is even a band out of England called 'The Happy Monday's". I wonder if they get yelled at?
So i am off, it is Monday and i am going to enjoy it.
do not forget to check out my message board http://captainhespeler.proboards52.com/index.cgi Meet Me on the Corner
Until next time Keep a cold one in the Fridge you never know when i will show up.
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Monday, July 30, 2007
Wedding Crashers Part 2?
This is a picture taken Saturday night at my daughters wedding. Look in the upper left hand corner, could this be a spirit of an old Hespelerite crashing the wedding? Thought i felt my dad around!!!!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
My favourite live Earth songs
Like a lot of people i managed to catch a few of the songs performed on this past weekends concert festival and here is my list of the best songs.
The Heat goes on
Helter Swealter
Sympathy FROM the Devil
She blinded me with Liberal-biased Pseudo Science
Gore's so vain
Burn(ed) in the USA
Everybody wants to cool the world
goodbye Yellow specked Toad
Help me{i think I'm scalding}
and my number 1--Papas got a brand new handmade reasonable hemp based tote bag.
The Heat goes on
Helter Swealter
Sympathy FROM the Devil
She blinded me with Liberal-biased Pseudo Science
Gore's so vain
Burn(ed) in the USA
Everybody wants to cool the world
goodbye Yellow specked Toad
Help me{i think I'm scalding}
and my number 1--Papas got a brand new handmade reasonable hemp based tote bag.
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Monday, June 04, 2007
Underpants and Galoshes
Now that i have your attention: The title of this piece refers to word that tickle my funnybone. Everyone has those words, little things that make you laugh. So without delay here is a list of some words that do it for me.
Bagpipes-Kumguat-dribble-wonky-velcrow-bonk-flop-quagmire-crevasse-trousers-punkydoodle-Bush[oh sorry, he just makes me laugh]-homo erectus-belfry-shenanigans-haberdashy-titmouse-smurf-hullabaloo-bamboozle-crumpets-wiffleball-dildo-crevice-glockenspiel-kalamazoo-cucamonga-guacamole-spleen-conservative[refer to bush]-swifter-walla walla-schnitzel-
well that is just a few, i will think of more later.
Oh and underpants and Galoshes.
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Enjoying summer
My Dad, Mom and my two daughters 20 years ago. In our minds we are always looking back and remembering the good times and the events that occurred. I can't remember where this was taken but i believe on lake Nippising outside of North Bay. And time certainly does fly as this summer the little girl sandwiched between Mom and Dad will be getting married. But more on that later! So enjoy the summer and the memories it creates.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Religious names for Breasts!
The Lords pair
Heavenly canteens
Pearly weights
Pastor Baiters
Beelzeboobs
Pamela 36:D
First and second Mammalonians
The daughters of Levtiticus
Mounds of shame
Racks of Lamb of God.
There they are, now hopefully a bolt of lightening doesn't hit me!
Heavenly canteens
Pearly weights
Pastor Baiters
Beelzeboobs
Pamela 36:D
First and second Mammalonians
The daughters of Levtiticus
Mounds of shame
Racks of Lamb of God.
There they are, now hopefully a bolt of lightening doesn't hit me!
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
The people on the street
Waterloo is definitely not Hespeler. While working up there for the last week, near the University's i noticed a lot of different things and people, a mixed crowd that is for sure.
following is what i noticed.
Overweight people that wear tight fitting clothes, people that walk with a constant grin or a constant frown, people talking to themselves, lovers joined at the hip, Chinese,Iraqis,Jamaicans and many other cultures hanging together with no problems, people yapping on cell phones, speed walkers, people just taking there time,post beat hippies, people overdressed for the weather and people under dressed for the weather, official looking people, sloppy looking people, straight couples and gay couples, people lost in thought, people eating while walking, people with long hair, people with short hair and people with no hair, people on bikes,scooters, skateboards, Rollerblades,walking dogs and even one walking a cat, people wearing hats, bandannas even a sombrero, people with backpacks, briefcases and grocery bags, people reading while walking, listening to their i-pods and probably the coolest guy was the one rollerblading while playing his guitar, now that was worth the day.
So go out and see what the world presents to you.
following is what i noticed.
Overweight people that wear tight fitting clothes, people that walk with a constant grin or a constant frown, people talking to themselves, lovers joined at the hip, Chinese,Iraqis,Jamaicans and many other cultures hanging together with no problems, people yapping on cell phones, speed walkers, people just taking there time,post beat hippies, people overdressed for the weather and people under dressed for the weather, official looking people, sloppy looking people, straight couples and gay couples, people lost in thought, people eating while walking, people with long hair, people with short hair and people with no hair, people on bikes,scooters, skateboards, Rollerblades,walking dogs and even one walking a cat, people wearing hats, bandannas even a sombrero, people with backpacks, briefcases and grocery bags, people reading while walking, listening to their i-pods and probably the coolest guy was the one rollerblading while playing his guitar, now that was worth the day.
So go out and see what the world presents to you.
Sunday, May 06, 2007
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
1976[From the archives]
What sets off a memory,i have no idea but today one occurred. I received a C.D. from a friend in Texas and when i played it a whole slew of memory's came flashing back to me. They are not life altering memories and who knows maybe not all of them are real. But for some reason they are there and i feel the need to tell them so bear with me while i go back to 1976.
An early fall evening and i am cruising down the back roads of my town just turned 19,3 freinds and myself a case of Molson Diamond and some cinci bud,the 1969 Dodge
coronet running smoothly and some Kiss[destroyer] playing on the cassette deck. Fighting over which movie we are going to see,i want Taxi Driver, Tony wants All the Presidents Men,big Bill wants to go see the Omen and Gary says the Bad news bears cause that is where most of the girls will be so we argue a little more and decide to just get some more beer and keep driving. Gas at 29 cents a gallon seems good so we keep going. We continue to argue over who has the best new album out right now,Aerosmith rocks,AC/DC high voltage,Blue Oyster Cult Agents of Fortune or the debut album of some band called Boston,we reach no decision and decide to listen to them all. More beer and a little more bud and next thing we know the debate is who would win a drinking contest our Prime minister Pierre Trudeau or the American President Gerald Ford we decide it would be Trudeau because we would be using Canadian beer. The conversation continues as we discuss this new show called Charlies Angels and just who is the hottest of them all no contest as we all agree Farrah Fawcett is the most duable. The topic then becomes the just completed Montreal Olympics and how poor Canada did,we discuss the Son of Sam killings in New York city,the Hoopla in the U.S. over the Bi-centennial,this new band we have heard about called the Ramones,as yet we have not heard them but they sound interesting,we discuss our girls,drink more beer and then remember that it is almost 11:00 and we have to get to one of our homes to watch Saturday Night Live. After that things get a little hazy but thats o.k. this memory is a good one and i will treasure it. And while the 4 of us don't get together that often anymore we all still remember the nights we want to. So to my Friend in Grand Praire Texas thank you for the Nitzinger C.Ds and for the memorys they brought back.
An early fall evening and i am cruising down the back roads of my town just turned 19,3 freinds and myself a case of Molson Diamond and some cinci bud,the 1969 Dodge
coronet running smoothly and some Kiss[destroyer] playing on the cassette deck. Fighting over which movie we are going to see,i want Taxi Driver, Tony wants All the Presidents Men,big Bill wants to go see the Omen and Gary says the Bad news bears cause that is where most of the girls will be so we argue a little more and decide to just get some more beer and keep driving. Gas at 29 cents a gallon seems good so we keep going. We continue to argue over who has the best new album out right now,Aerosmith rocks,AC/DC high voltage,Blue Oyster Cult Agents of Fortune or the debut album of some band called Boston,we reach no decision and decide to listen to them all. More beer and a little more bud and next thing we know the debate is who would win a drinking contest our Prime minister Pierre Trudeau or the American President Gerald Ford we decide it would be Trudeau because we would be using Canadian beer. The conversation continues as we discuss this new show called Charlies Angels and just who is the hottest of them all no contest as we all agree Farrah Fawcett is the most duable. The topic then becomes the just completed Montreal Olympics and how poor Canada did,we discuss the Son of Sam killings in New York city,the Hoopla in the U.S. over the Bi-centennial,this new band we have heard about called the Ramones,as yet we have not heard them but they sound interesting,we discuss our girls,drink more beer and then remember that it is almost 11:00 and we have to get to one of our homes to watch Saturday Night Live. After that things get a little hazy but thats o.k. this memory is a good one and i will treasure it. And while the 4 of us don't get together that often anymore we all still remember the nights we want to. So to my Friend in Grand Praire Texas thank you for the Nitzinger C.Ds and for the memorys they brought back.
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Another letter from WW2
My brother gave me a copy of a letter he had in his possession from another of our Uncles from Hespeler who served in the 2nd World War. Following is the letters contents.
August 17 1941
The Editor:
I received a copy of D.W. and W bugle last night when i came on duty and was really pleased to read all the local news. I'm writing this on duty so if it seems rather disjointed it is because i had to get up to quiet a wild bunch of Irishman we have here one with a fractured skull and when i say wild Irishman i mean exactly that.
The first thing that caught my eye were the pictures. They really looked interesting but you know i worked at all those jobs and somehow or other they never looked the same to me. Still I would not mind taking a whirl at it again. Maybe i will after this issue is over.
How is Red Wilfong, is he still in the dye house and Bill Clark,Shorty Reid and all the old gang. Is Jimmy Tordoff still on the tubs or has he decided to quit wahing Khaki and start wearing it. By the look of the paper the mill must be getting a preety good going over. Is Red Watson and his trusty .38 still guarding the back of the dyehouse. Oh yes one more thing i probably should know myself. Who is the patriotic society i have received two parcels from them and did not know whom i should send a letter of thanks. whoever they are must be getting the idea that i'm not grateful.
Next time you go through the dyehouse will you remind Jim Cutting that he still owes me that letter he promised a year ago. Since coming over here i have run across most of the boys in the 1st division. Just out of curiosity who is June Whorly, I have never heard of her myself but she seems to be creating a sensation among the boys of this unit.
I've been here eight months now and i think we have had rain 5 or 6 days a wek every week. It never rains in Scotland I've been there twice and it rained both times. Next time i'm going to Ireland.Most letters that i have read that fellows have written to the reporter have been very elaborate in describing the beauty of the country,the hospitality of the people. I will admit that the people as a whole are hospitable.Only it is pretty hard to convince some of them that the people of Canada don't ride down main trails waving tomahawks.
Due to scarcity of films and the fact that the sun never shines people over here don't take many pictures. but this one was taken in the surgical ward. Never mind i cant find it,here is another one instead. tell John From if he is still in the dyehouse that he might as well stay where he is, they have no schnapps here and the beer is terrible.
Well i guess that's just about winds up the news, although it seems that i all i have done is ask questions, so I'll say, as they say in Scotland
Cheerie--Bye
Ken Mclaughlin
Canadian Army Overseas.
Uncle Ken lived a full life and passed away on February 12th 2007.
August 17 1941
The Editor:
I received a copy of D.W. and W bugle last night when i came on duty and was really pleased to read all the local news. I'm writing this on duty so if it seems rather disjointed it is because i had to get up to quiet a wild bunch of Irishman we have here one with a fractured skull and when i say wild Irishman i mean exactly that.
The first thing that caught my eye were the pictures. They really looked interesting but you know i worked at all those jobs and somehow or other they never looked the same to me. Still I would not mind taking a whirl at it again. Maybe i will after this issue is over.
How is Red Wilfong, is he still in the dye house and Bill Clark,Shorty Reid and all the old gang. Is Jimmy Tordoff still on the tubs or has he decided to quit wahing Khaki and start wearing it. By the look of the paper the mill must be getting a preety good going over. Is Red Watson and his trusty .38 still guarding the back of the dyehouse. Oh yes one more thing i probably should know myself. Who is the patriotic society i have received two parcels from them and did not know whom i should send a letter of thanks. whoever they are must be getting the idea that i'm not grateful.
Next time you go through the dyehouse will you remind Jim Cutting that he still owes me that letter he promised a year ago. Since coming over here i have run across most of the boys in the 1st division. Just out of curiosity who is June Whorly, I have never heard of her myself but she seems to be creating a sensation among the boys of this unit.
I've been here eight months now and i think we have had rain 5 or 6 days a wek every week. It never rains in Scotland I've been there twice and it rained both times. Next time i'm going to Ireland.Most letters that i have read that fellows have written to the reporter have been very elaborate in describing the beauty of the country,the hospitality of the people. I will admit that the people as a whole are hospitable.Only it is pretty hard to convince some of them that the people of Canada don't ride down main trails waving tomahawks.
Due to scarcity of films and the fact that the sun never shines people over here don't take many pictures. but this one was taken in the surgical ward. Never mind i cant find it,here is another one instead. tell John From if he is still in the dyehouse that he might as well stay where he is, they have no schnapps here and the beer is terrible.
Well i guess that's just about winds up the news, although it seems that i all i have done is ask questions, so I'll say, as they say in Scotland
Cheerie--Bye
Ken Mclaughlin
Canadian Army Overseas.
Uncle Ken lived a full life and passed away on February 12th 2007.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Phonebooth scribble
Common Sense is the most uncommon thing in the world
In the tradition of my ancestors i have decided to honor them by remaining a slacker
A Ukrainian woman was arrested after custom officials caught her smuggling cocaine inside a vibrator.
In ancient Rome, it was considered a sign of leadership to be born with a crooked nose
Good Thing:Finding Easter eggs on Easter morning
Bad Thing:Finding Easter Eggs on Christmas Morning
At the Gas Station of love i got the self-service pump
I stopped going to my masseuse, she just rubbed me the wrong way
What would happen if you found a four leaf clover under a ladder?
Success always occurs in private, failures in public
Famous last words: Yoko, why don't you try to sing one
My wife has started calling my computer my square headed spouse
Another oxymoron=safety hazard
Playing harp duets with Hoffa=euphemism for dying
An interesting book title=Prepare to meet your maker by Eva Destruction
Old owls never die, they just don't give a hoot.
A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it.
Every day is a good day, some are just better than others
And what ever happened to Goldfish swallowing and phone booth stuffing?
In the tradition of my ancestors i have decided to honor them by remaining a slacker
A Ukrainian woman was arrested after custom officials caught her smuggling cocaine inside a vibrator.
In ancient Rome, it was considered a sign of leadership to be born with a crooked nose
Good Thing:Finding Easter eggs on Easter morning
Bad Thing:Finding Easter Eggs on Christmas Morning
At the Gas Station of love i got the self-service pump
I stopped going to my masseuse, she just rubbed me the wrong way
What would happen if you found a four leaf clover under a ladder?
Success always occurs in private, failures in public
Famous last words: Yoko, why don't you try to sing one
My wife has started calling my computer my square headed spouse
Another oxymoron=safety hazard
Playing harp duets with Hoffa=euphemism for dying
An interesting book title=Prepare to meet your maker by Eva Destruction
Old owls never die, they just don't give a hoot.
A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it.
Every day is a good day, some are just better than others
And what ever happened to Goldfish swallowing and phone booth stuffing?
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Sunday, April 01, 2007
Rife Street Rumbles
I went to buy a camouflage shirt but i couldn't find any
Math and Alcohol don't mix, so don't drink and derive
Before they invented drawing boards what did they go back to?
I'm not old enough to understand woman, but according to my Dad nobody has ever lived long enough to find out.
Polynesia; Memory loss in parrots
I suffer from chronic apathy, i was going to see a doctor about it, but i really didn't care.
Beer: The reason i wake up every afternoon.
The human stomach must make a new layer of mucas every two weeks or it will digest itself.
Tequila in a birdbath? Tequila mockingbird!
I told my psychiatrist that he was just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
Ever stop to think and forget to start again.
I don't say this often but...grrrr
My goal in life has become clear...the broccoli must die
Her lips were saying no but her eyes were saying, READ MY LIPS.
Shooting bunnies ,a euphemism for farting.
I am turning 50 and that is important. I can sleep with someone 1/2 my age and not go to jail.
If everything is going well you probably overlooked something.
A Charles T. Sprinkle was arrested for public urination..not that is irony.
That is all for now, will see you all later!
Math and Alcohol don't mix, so don't drink and derive
Before they invented drawing boards what did they go back to?
I'm not old enough to understand woman, but according to my Dad nobody has ever lived long enough to find out.
Polynesia; Memory loss in parrots
I suffer from chronic apathy, i was going to see a doctor about it, but i really didn't care.
Beer: The reason i wake up every afternoon.
The human stomach must make a new layer of mucas every two weeks or it will digest itself.
Tequila in a birdbath? Tequila mockingbird!
I told my psychiatrist that he was just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
Ever stop to think and forget to start again.
I don't say this often but...grrrr
My goal in life has become clear...the broccoli must die
Her lips were saying no but her eyes were saying, READ MY LIPS.
Shooting bunnies ,a euphemism for farting.
I am turning 50 and that is important. I can sleep with someone 1/2 my age and not go to jail.
If everything is going well you probably overlooked something.
A Charles T. Sprinkle was arrested for public urination..not that is irony.
That is all for now, will see you all later!
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Fun Way's to live Longer
My doctor has given me a list of ways to improve my life and help me live longer, so i will share them with you.
Drink Red Wine
Eat Dark Chocolate
Smile always
Have more sex
Relax more
Simple exercises
Sleep 8 hours a day
Spend more time with loved ones
Do more jigsaw puzzles and mind games
Always be positive.
Now some of those are easy, i mean who could say no to more Red Wine and Dark Chocolate. If i had more sex i would probably smile more often. and it would make me a little more relaxed and allow me to sleep a good 8 hours. But the jigsaw puzzles and mind games? May not be able to stay positive doing those.
Drink Red Wine
Eat Dark Chocolate
Smile always
Have more sex
Relax more
Simple exercises
Sleep 8 hours a day
Spend more time with loved ones
Do more jigsaw puzzles and mind games
Always be positive.
Now some of those are easy, i mean who could say no to more Red Wine and Dark Chocolate. If i had more sex i would probably smile more often. and it would make me a little more relaxed and allow me to sleep a good 8 hours. But the jigsaw puzzles and mind games? May not be able to stay positive doing those.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
You don't know Jack!
One of the most used terms in the English language is the word Jack. It is used in many forms and ways and here are some of them!
Billy Jack
Cracker Jack
Farmer Jack
Jack Daniels
Jack Sprat
Jack Frost
Union Jack
Whisky Jack
Apple Jack
Black Jack
One-eyed Jacks
Jack off
hi-jack
lumber jack
Jackpot
Jack Rabbit
Jack Straw
Jack-in-the box
Jack-o-lantern
Jackass
flapjacks
jack knife
jack boots
skyjack
phone jack
jackhammer
Jack the Bear
Jack and Jill
Jack of all trades.
Well, there are some of them.
Billy Jack
Cracker Jack
Farmer Jack
Jack Daniels
Jack Sprat
Jack Frost
Union Jack
Whisky Jack
Apple Jack
Black Jack
One-eyed Jacks
Jack off
hi-jack
lumber jack
Jackpot
Jack Rabbit
Jack Straw
Jack-in-the box
Jack-o-lantern
Jackass
flapjacks
jack knife
jack boots
skyjack
phone jack
jackhammer
Jack the Bear
Jack and Jill
Jack of all trades.
Well, there are some of them.
Monday, February 19, 2007
Epistle to Dippy
If i were two faced would i be wearing this one--Abe Lincoln
I have found the perfect bedtime story's to put my grandchildren to sleep, recycled "according to Jim" Television show scripts.
Iguanas,Koalas and Komodo Dragons all have 3 penis's.
I need tacos or i will explode.I do that sometimes.
If you always do what interests you, at least one person is pleased.
Good looking people turn me off, myself included---Patrik Swaze
God never gives us more than we can handle,luckily a local restaurant has a big boy all you can eat buffet.
Al Capones business card stated that he was a used furniture dealer.
The only difference between Republicans and Democrats is that the Democrats allow poor people to be corrupt as well.
Actually you can beat City Hall. All you need is a bulldozer and a wrecking ball.
If you are feeling good don't worry, you will get over it.
Reality is a nice place to visit but i really would not want to live there.
If you can't beat 'em arrange to have them beating.
Slurm=The slime that exists under the soap bar when it sits in the dish too long.
A friend is someone who has the same enemy's as you.
And in closing remember
Woman are trouble and we Men are trouble seekers.
I have found the perfect bedtime story's to put my grandchildren to sleep, recycled "according to Jim" Television show scripts.
Iguanas,Koalas and Komodo Dragons all have 3 penis's.
I need tacos or i will explode.I do that sometimes.
If you always do what interests you, at least one person is pleased.
Good looking people turn me off, myself included---Patrik Swaze
God never gives us more than we can handle,luckily a local restaurant has a big boy all you can eat buffet.
Al Capones business card stated that he was a used furniture dealer.
The only difference between Republicans and Democrats is that the Democrats allow poor people to be corrupt as well.
Actually you can beat City Hall. All you need is a bulldozer and a wrecking ball.
If you are feeling good don't worry, you will get over it.
Reality is a nice place to visit but i really would not want to live there.
If you can't beat 'em arrange to have them beating.
Slurm=The slime that exists under the soap bar when it sits in the dish too long.
A friend is someone who has the same enemy's as you.
And in closing remember
Woman are trouble and we Men are trouble seekers.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
The Best Chickan Salad Recipe Ever
No not really! but since you are here, some more crap that is spilling out of my brain.
The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it is unfamiliar territory.
Did you ever wonder what was the best thing before sliced bread?
"A proof is a proof,what kind of proof?It's a proof!And when you have a good proof it is because it is a proof"---Jean Chretien
Don't worry about what people say about you out loud, worry about what people whisper about you!
There are worst things in life than death, have you ever spent an hour with an Insurance salesman.
I try to take it one day at a time, but sometimes several days gang up on me at once.
Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you please-Mark Twain
Cross Country skiing is great..if you live in a small country
As i was driving by the local psychics house i wondered if she knew that it was me giving her the finger.
Governments do not solve problems, it subsidises them--Ronald Reagan
From what i have been told pigs are extremely intelligent, I'll believe that when they tell us to stop eating them.
The nice thing about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being proven right or being pleasantly surprised.
The average dog sled team can kill and devour a grown man in less than 5 minutes.
The trouble with this country is that there are too many people saying"The trouble with this country is"
My how time flys when you are mortified.............Have a nice day everyone!
The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it is unfamiliar territory.
Did you ever wonder what was the best thing before sliced bread?
"A proof is a proof,what kind of proof?It's a proof!And when you have a good proof it is because it is a proof"---Jean Chretien
Don't worry about what people say about you out loud, worry about what people whisper about you!
There are worst things in life than death, have you ever spent an hour with an Insurance salesman.
I try to take it one day at a time, but sometimes several days gang up on me at once.
Get your facts first and then you can distort them as much as you please-Mark Twain
Cross Country skiing is great..if you live in a small country
As i was driving by the local psychics house i wondered if she knew that it was me giving her the finger.
Governments do not solve problems, it subsidises them--Ronald Reagan
From what i have been told pigs are extremely intelligent, I'll believe that when they tell us to stop eating them.
The nice thing about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being proven right or being pleasantly surprised.
The average dog sled team can kill and devour a grown man in less than 5 minutes.
The trouble with this country is that there are too many people saying"The trouble with this country is"
My how time flys when you are mortified.............Have a nice day everyone!
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Who would of thunk it
For those of us who remember watching the "Ultimate Hockey Series" in 1972, this picture of Ken Dryden and Tretiak must be a sweet and sour type of moment.Wednesday, January 24, 2007
More Ramblings from Queen Street
Face it America, It's Obama or the ice Queen...good luck.
Bozone Layer:The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer unfortunately shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
I feel sorry for people that don't drink. When they wake up in the morning that is the best they are going to feel all day.
850 peanuts are needed to make one 18 oz jar of peanut butter.
I don't know why some people don't believe in sex before marriage. Hell it is a lot more believable than sex after marriage.
I bet those gangster rappers aren't that tough at all. Hell my 90 year old uncle can swear just as good as them and he wears pants that are 3 sizes too big as well.
I finally figured out why waiters give you their first names. it is in case you have to file a missing persons report after a couple of hours.
If at first you don't succeed, then sky diving is not for you.
Support bacteria: It's the only culture some people have
War does not determine who is right,it determines who is LEFT
Crazy is a relative term in my family.
Best friends are the people that know all about you and still put up with you.
I fought the lawn and the lawn won.
A day without sunshine is like,you know, night.
I wonder who was the first person who looked at a chicken and thought"I am going to eat the first thing that comes out of it's ass".
Abandon the search for truth, settle for a good fantasy.
And remember BUCKLE UP. It makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car.
Bozone Layer:The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer unfortunately shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
I feel sorry for people that don't drink. When they wake up in the morning that is the best they are going to feel all day.
850 peanuts are needed to make one 18 oz jar of peanut butter.
I don't know why some people don't believe in sex before marriage. Hell it is a lot more believable than sex after marriage.
I bet those gangster rappers aren't that tough at all. Hell my 90 year old uncle can swear just as good as them and he wears pants that are 3 sizes too big as well.
I finally figured out why waiters give you their first names. it is in case you have to file a missing persons report after a couple of hours.
If at first you don't succeed, then sky diving is not for you.
Support bacteria: It's the only culture some people have
War does not determine who is right,it determines who is LEFT
Crazy is a relative term in my family.
Best friends are the people that know all about you and still put up with you.
I fought the lawn and the lawn won.
A day without sunshine is like,you know, night.
I wonder who was the first person who looked at a chicken and thought"I am going to eat the first thing that comes out of it's ass".
Abandon the search for truth, settle for a good fantasy.
And remember BUCKLE UP. It makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car.
Monday, January 08, 2007
For the Love of the game
The 1951-52 Elmira Polar Kings. They won the Ontario Intermediate"B" championship in a 9 game series against Bracebridge that year. These guys all had to work for a living and played hockey for the love of the game. My father is the goaltender on the right of the picture facing us. He lived in Hespeler, but drove to Elmira to play his passion.
Thursday, January 04, 2007
How Come?
The holidays are over and it is time to back to real life, but first, over the Christmas season my Grand-Children asked me some really weird questions. So here are a few of them that i can remember.
Why is the cashew the only nut you can not buy in the shell?
How come our fingers are different sizes and shapes?
Why does the moon seem to follow us when you drive?
Why does ice cream give you brain freeze?
Why does ice cream melt?
Why do songs get stuck in your head?
How come birds can sit on electrical wires?
Where do bugs go in the winter?
Why are bubbles round?
How come the sky is blue?
Why do leaves change color in the fall?
and finally...why is smoke coming out of your ears grandpa?
Why is the cashew the only nut you can not buy in the shell?
How come our fingers are different sizes and shapes?
Why does the moon seem to follow us when you drive?
Why does ice cream give you brain freeze?
Why does ice cream melt?
Why do songs get stuck in your head?
How come birds can sit on electrical wires?
Where do bugs go in the winter?
Why are bubbles round?
How come the sky is blue?
Why do leaves change color in the fall?
and finally...why is smoke coming out of your ears grandpa?
Thursday, December 28, 2006
What's Wrong
Recent incidents in Hespeler involving teenagers has gotten me thinking about my days as a teen and what trouble we got into, and i can tell you we were different than the group today.
I became a teen during the early '70s and while we drank what we could get and smoked some of the "whacky tabaccy" we were not as destructive or insolent as the teens today. Yes we walked the streets sometimes and may have thrown a few eggs at some peoples houses{sorry Mr. Hodges} we had no graffiti urges, no urges to break the windows in the library, no desire to set fires in front of stores in fact you could call my generation "pussies" if you like, but at least we could use our time and energy to better effect than the brainless bunch that roam outside today. On any giving night there would be a road hockey game on Cooper Street or on Hungerford road that would go until 9 or ten and except for the bush's in front of the Panabaker house no damage would be done. And on the weekends a party may break out on what is now Holiday Inn Drive, but back then was an old wooded area totally inaccessible by car, so we could see someone coming and we could high tail it out of there. Back then we also had regular police patrols and you never knew when Flashlight Freddie or Cpl. Eagle would pop out of nowhere and nab you. As a matter of fact i think we were all afraid of what our Fathers would say more than the police.
We didn't have video games full of violence and gore, and a 300 channel universe that offers everything on demand. We were not allowed to just sit a t home and leach off the old man we had to work with some of our spare time. Hell at 15 i was working for my Dad down at Artex Woolens after school and on weekends. Sometimes i wonder how i did all the little mischievous things i did back then, because i certainly did not have the free time that kids today have. And that brings me to my main point, the reason for some of the problems, society has evolved and not for the better. The young offenders act has certainly led to kids not being scared of the police or punishment, the fact that you can not really discipline children is a big problem today, even though my father never used the belt, just the fear of it was enough. The lack of a police station in Hespeler is certainly a factor as there is no presence on a steady basis. I can't remember the last time i saw a road hockey game or a pickup baseball game being played behind Our lady of Fatima grade school. And of course marijuana has Been replaced by "crack" a drug that makes you aggressive as opposed to pot which would send us giggling into an area where no one could see us and we could sit and stare at an ant moving across a floor for hours. And asking someone to listen to a James Taylor or Harry Chapin CD today brings a laugh, hell Black Sabbath is tame compared to some of the Rap and Death Metal that these kids call music today. Read a book? Don't make me laugh. Is there hope? Well let's pray there is. Suddenly i have an urge to grab a bottle of Lemon Gin, call up some of the guy's and go play some road hockey...naaa it's late and i have to get up for work in the morning. Have a good Day everyone!
I became a teen during the early '70s and while we drank what we could get and smoked some of the "whacky tabaccy" we were not as destructive or insolent as the teens today. Yes we walked the streets sometimes and may have thrown a few eggs at some peoples houses{sorry Mr. Hodges} we had no graffiti urges, no urges to break the windows in the library, no desire to set fires in front of stores in fact you could call my generation "pussies" if you like, but at least we could use our time and energy to better effect than the brainless bunch that roam outside today. On any giving night there would be a road hockey game on Cooper Street or on Hungerford road that would go until 9 or ten and except for the bush's in front of the Panabaker house no damage would be done. And on the weekends a party may break out on what is now Holiday Inn Drive, but back then was an old wooded area totally inaccessible by car, so we could see someone coming and we could high tail it out of there. Back then we also had regular police patrols and you never knew when Flashlight Freddie or Cpl. Eagle would pop out of nowhere and nab you. As a matter of fact i think we were all afraid of what our Fathers would say more than the police.
We didn't have video games full of violence and gore, and a 300 channel universe that offers everything on demand. We were not allowed to just sit a t home and leach off the old man we had to work with some of our spare time. Hell at 15 i was working for my Dad down at Artex Woolens after school and on weekends. Sometimes i wonder how i did all the little mischievous things i did back then, because i certainly did not have the free time that kids today have. And that brings me to my main point, the reason for some of the problems, society has evolved and not for the better. The young offenders act has certainly led to kids not being scared of the police or punishment, the fact that you can not really discipline children is a big problem today, even though my father never used the belt, just the fear of it was enough. The lack of a police station in Hespeler is certainly a factor as there is no presence on a steady basis. I can't remember the last time i saw a road hockey game or a pickup baseball game being played behind Our lady of Fatima grade school. And of course marijuana has Been replaced by "crack" a drug that makes you aggressive as opposed to pot which would send us giggling into an area where no one could see us and we could sit and stare at an ant moving across a floor for hours. And asking someone to listen to a James Taylor or Harry Chapin CD today brings a laugh, hell Black Sabbath is tame compared to some of the Rap and Death Metal that these kids call music today. Read a book? Don't make me laugh. Is there hope? Well let's pray there is. Suddenly i have an urge to grab a bottle of Lemon Gin, call up some of the guy's and go play some road hockey...naaa it's late and i have to get up for work in the morning. Have a good Day everyone!
3 Stages of Man
The three stages of man
--he believes in Santa Clause
--He doesn't believe in Santa Clause
--He is Santa Clause
Responsible Holiday Drinking=i am trying to schedule it so i get it all done before lunch
If you don't make mistakes, you aren't really trying
I'd tell you a joke about a pencil, but it doesn't have any point
I was named after my father, I'm called Dad
A conservative government is an organized hypocrisy---Benjamen Disraeli
A hotdog at the ball park beats a steak at the ritz---Bogie
Why does Hawaii have an Interstate highway?
Authentic reproduction=oxymoron or what?
Why is the man who invests my money called a BROKER
The grass is always greener;;;when you remember to water your lawn
How come quicksand works so slowly?
Coffee=break fluid
Atheism is a non-prophet organization
Elephants can't jump, every other mammal can
I like long walks...especially when they are by people that annoy me
A clear conscience is usually a sign of a bad memory
Therapy is expensive..popping bubble wrap is cheap..you decide
And don't bother me..i am living happily ever after.
--he believes in Santa Clause
--He doesn't believe in Santa Clause
--He is Santa Clause
Responsible Holiday Drinking=i am trying to schedule it so i get it all done before lunch
If you don't make mistakes, you aren't really trying
I'd tell you a joke about a pencil, but it doesn't have any point
I was named after my father, I'm called Dad
A conservative government is an organized hypocrisy---Benjamen Disraeli
A hotdog at the ball park beats a steak at the ritz---Bogie
Why does Hawaii have an Interstate highway?
Authentic reproduction=oxymoron or what?
Why is the man who invests my money called a BROKER
The grass is always greener;;;when you remember to water your lawn
How come quicksand works so slowly?
Coffee=break fluid
Atheism is a non-prophet organization
Elephants can't jump, every other mammal can
I like long walks...especially when they are by people that annoy me
A clear conscience is usually a sign of a bad memory
Therapy is expensive..popping bubble wrap is cheap..you decide
And don't bother me..i am living happily ever after.
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Tuesday, December 19, 2006
10 things that men understand about woman
10.
9.
8.
7.
6.
5.
4.
3.
2.
1.
Okay maybe i had better re think this one!
Monday, December 11, 2006
12 Rejected Christmas toys
12 toys that were rejected for this Christmas season
MY LITTLE PONY GLUE FACTORY
JOHN CANDYLAND
PEPPIN TOMMYS NIGHT VISION GOGGLES
EASYBAKE METH LAB
TONKA TOYS FOR WHITE TRASH
PLAYDOUGH BLING FACTORY
ROADKILL RACCOON
O.J. SIMPSON ACTION FIGURE, WITH LIFE LIKE SLAHING MOTION
SHIITE PET
XXX FILES ACTION FIGURES
BULIMIC BARBIE
ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLE POWER RANGERS.
MY LITTLE PONY GLUE FACTORY
JOHN CANDYLAND
PEPPIN TOMMYS NIGHT VISION GOGGLES
EASYBAKE METH LAB
TONKA TOYS FOR WHITE TRASH
PLAYDOUGH BLING FACTORY
ROADKILL RACCOON
O.J. SIMPSON ACTION FIGURE, WITH LIFE LIKE SLAHING MOTION
SHIITE PET
XXX FILES ACTION FIGURES
BULIMIC BARBIE
ALTERNATIVE LIFESTYLE POWER RANGERS.
Thursday, November 23, 2006
Sittings 8
Just some more useless ramblings.
The most common name in the world is now Muhammad...Betty Boop is still the sexiest Cartoon female ever...Buzz Aldrins mothers maiden name was MOON...I think i drink too much coffee, Juan Valdez just named a donkey after me...The inflatable Dart Board, was there ever a more stupid invention?...An intellectual is just someone who has found something more interesting than sex...Kraft Dinner or Oatmeal,,what's more comforting to you?...now that the pope has pissed off all the Muslims I am worried he will go after us Catholics next...an elephant is just a mouse built to government specifications..."Solutions are not the answer" [Richard Nixon]...I find it a bit unnerving that Doctors call what they do "Practise"...so they cancelled OJ Simpsons book, damn there go my stocking stuffers..A Polygon=A dead parrot...for the American Thanksgiving Donald Rumsfeild is having a big helping of Crow, with sour grapes and humble pie...and after 3 days men grow weary of a wench, a guest and the rain...why is it only pigs and humans can get sunburns...the hardest part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just plain stupid...i decided not to buy life insurance on myself, my wife has enough incentive as it is...
Thats it, until we meet again, remember...happiness is having a large loving and caring family--in another city!
Monday, November 13, 2006
Elections
Today is the municipal election day here in Canada and while not as many people get out to vote as in a Provincial or Federal election there is still a little interest and intrigue in any election. And this got me to thinking about how my interest in politics began. The man's name was Max Saltsman and while i can not remember the exact year i do know that it was in the mid 60's and it happened at an event in Forbes Park in the centre of Hespeler. It was a fair of some type and Mr. Saltsman was campaigning as well. And while he shook hands with our parents and talked up our neighbours he also found time to talk to us kids and crack a joke, ask us about our interests and likes and just make us feel that we were important to his cause, even though we could not vote he realised that wee could influence our parents and perhaps make one or two change their minds. And of course that spiffy hat with his name on it that he gave us did not hurt either.
About 6 years later i was in high school and another election was upcoming and once again max Saltsman was running, so i talked with him about helping his cause and again he made me feel that my opinion mattered and ever since then i have been interested in the political world, even though i do not belong to one political party[i consider myself a Centrist] and Mr. Saltsman is long gone from this world it is because of him that many of us in our 40's and 50's are political junkies. At least that is what i believe, so make sure you vote and remember whether your candidate wins or loses is not important, the fact you had a say is what matters. Now if i could only find that old Saltsman hat, i would look pretty spiffy as i cast my ballot.
About 6 years later i was in high school and another election was upcoming and once again max Saltsman was running, so i talked with him about helping his cause and again he made me feel that my opinion mattered and ever since then i have been interested in the political world, even though i do not belong to one political party[i consider myself a Centrist] and Mr. Saltsman is long gone from this world it is because of him that many of us in our 40's and 50's are political junkies. At least that is what i believe, so make sure you vote and remember whether your candidate wins or loses is not important, the fact you had a say is what matters. Now if i could only find that old Saltsman hat, i would look pretty spiffy as i cast my ballot.
Monday, October 30, 2006
Dribblings
Just some random thoughts from my brain:
PMS should really stand for: Psychotic mood shift
Chicago has the largest Polish population in the world except for Warsaw
While i am fully aware that money can not buy me happiness, I wouldn't mind being known as "the melancholy guy who drives the red Lamborghini"
I would rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy
Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets, and do suicide bombers wear seat belts?
I said nice dress, she heard nice boobs
Often when i am reading a good book i stop and thank the teacher who got me reading. That is i did, until she got an unlisted phone number.
consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of unexplained rug burns.
and finally remember: your lives are not in the lap of the Gods, instead they are in the hands of your Cooks.
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Old Man Winter is coming!
Well people, winter is on it's way so i thought i would put a couple pictures to remind you what it will look like!
Monday, October 23, 2006
Haunted Bus Tour Photos
I forgot to add some pictures of the bus tour that are available so here are three.
Hespeler Haunted Bus Tour
Once again another fine evening was had here in our little slab of earth we call Hespeler. The Hespeler haunted Bus Tour was held and our Host Mr. Paul Langan put on a marvelous show. We were able to see many sites that remain lost to the general public and the story's were presented in a very articulate and entertaining way. The Fiddler coming out of the bushes and the dis-embodied voice of the little girl were a fantastic addition to this years tour. Of course the police pulling over the bus was a little different, even though not planned but still made for a little light heartiness on the evening. And going to Glen Christie brought back many memories for me as i had not been there in over 25 years so that was a nice touch for me. And for my wife, who is not from around these parts, all this is new and interesting and as always she enjoyed it. So let's hope next year it can happen again. Thanks Paul from all of us, it was well worth the money.
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